Six enormous sausages, a mountain of eggs, and a sea of beans - these were just some of the ingredients in the daunting 'Six Belly Buster Breakfast Challenge' that I had spread in front of me.
I've watched countless hours of Guy Fieri tackle enormous portions across the globe and always asked myself, 'How hard can it be?' Well, I found out.
I had just under a week to prepare, so I pulled up videos of two of the industry's biggest stomachs, BeardMeatsFood and Randy Santel - who have both taken on this beast and won.
The setting, The Black Ladd, Buckstones Road - a rural pub on the outskirts of Shaw with a panoramic view of Manchester.
Upon entrance, I was greeted by general manager Carol Mahon beaming at the prospect of my failure - an easy £35 in the till, or more likely, because she was happy to see me!
Now the wait begins, as they prepare my mammoth meal: six of each bacon, hashbrowns, black puddings, sausages, eggs and mushrooms, three tomatoes, three slices of toast, three slices of fried bread and a large serving of beans - and I have just 30 minutes to complete it.
The strategy was simple - copy YouTuber BeardMeatsFood, finish the sausages in just over one minute, next the hash browns which I'll dust off with some beans - great, I should have 27 mins 45 secs to finish the rest.
Except, it's not that easy. Online, the dish looks manageable but when it was served up the size of the sausages shocked me!
I was told I was the first person to take on the challenge this year, and this time The Black Ladd meant business with its produce coming from its new local butcher.
It was time to get started, I threw my plan out the window almost instantly. The sausages were piping hot so, thinking quick in my seat, I powered through the tomatoes, hash browns and mushrooms first.
Fifteen minutes in and I was ready to burst, at this point I was slowly grazing on my full English - which was roughly three or four large portions in one.
I barely made a dent, I had only picked at the sausages - two of them, had one and a half rashes of bacon, a singular egg, three pieces of fried toast and half the beans.
I began to count the clock down, I was defeated, I was defeated really before I walked through the door - I knew that, the staff at The Black Ladd knew that, and you knew that before you had even finished reading the headline.
The last 12 minutes were the longest of my life, I'm not a quitter so I continued to eat all whilst being filmed, but I could only stomach the beans - one by one.
When my time in The Black Ladd's court room came to an end, my sentence began. Now, I must endure the next few hours trying not to be sick.
The drive home was silent, but for the odd rumble as my stomach desperately sought wriggle room, the radio was off - even Smooth couldn't drag me out of this food coma.
Sat next to me, was my ginormous doggy bag of food taunting me.
I was unsuccessful this time, but does that mean I'm going to give in and never tackle the Super Six Belly Buster Breakfast Challenge again? Yeah, it probably does.
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