“I’m a chancer, Jack of all trades, master of none,” joked Max Splodge, gleefully recalling Splodgenessabounds zany debut hit Two Pints of Lager and a Packet of Crisps Please.
“I was dying for a pint and I rushed into The Crown Inn at Chislehurst waving a fiver above my head and said to the barman, “Can I have two pints of lager and a packet of crisps please?
“He was having none of it, ‘The bell has gone son, you’ve missed last orders.
“I just had this mad tune in my head, though, and the next day I raced into the studio humming the riff, put it down on tape and shouted Two Pints of Lager and a packet of crisps please.”
The song was released as a B side to Simon Templar, a catchy and rocked-up version of the theme of the 1960’s television series The Saint, starring Roger Moore.
“The thing is, the rest of the band hated it (Two Pints) and it wasn’t even meant to be on the record,” added Splodge.
“It was something I did for my own amusement really, but they finally agreed it could be on the EP just to keep me quiet.”
When then Radio One DJ Mike Read picked up a copy of the record, he chose to play the B side instead, and Two Pints 0f Lager and A Packet of Crisps Please provided an instant hit for Splodgenessabounds.
“The whole thing was bonkers – within 48 hours the record was selling 20,000 copies a day and it soared to number seven in the charts,” said Splodge.
“We were invited on Top of the Pops but the day we were due to play the BBC was hit by industrial action and the show was cancelled.”
He added: “We did finally make it in on to Top of the Pops with our single Two Little Boys.
“Each copy came with a cardboard boomerang, guaranteed not to come back.”
Splodge, a part-time bingo caller, musician and actor, is revered as Rebellion Punk Festival’s official bingo caller.
His much-loved daily punk bingo provides the traditional openerat the Blackpool festival’s acoustic stage where many artists perform during the four-day punk bash.
Read also: The Only Ones Pete Perrett bringing band to Blackpool
He said: “I love it, calling the numbers. Number eight Garden Gate, number seventeen Dancing Queen. We’ve got plenty of good prizes this year too.
“I’ve got two shows during the festival – a solo Max Splodge gig doing loads of punk hits and we will be launching Splodgenessabounds new album, Standing on the Shoulders of Dwarves.”
Splodge is proud to be called a Rebellion veteran and the hit single even spurned the title for popular British sitcom Two Pints of Lager and a Packet of Crisps, starring Ralf Little.
“As far as I’m aware I’m the only artist to have played live at every Rebellion,” said Splodge.
“I still get people shouting the lyrics at me when I’m in the street and I always have a laugh with them.”
Splodge also starred for the Angelic Upstarts and when he discovered he was a descendant of Genghis Khan, he penned Mongols on the Streets of London and Lullaby of Mongolia as a tribute to the ancient warrior.
“It is completely true - I had a DNA test and it proved I was a distant relative of Genghis Khan,” he said.
Rebellion Festival, Winter Gardens, Blackpool, August 3-6. Headliners include The Damned, New Model Army, Henry Rollins, Die Toten Hosen. Details from www.rebellionfestival.com
Comments: Our rules
We want our comments to be a lively and valuable part of our community - a place where readers can debate and engage with the most important local issues. The ability to comment on our stories is a privilege, not a right, however, and that privilege may be withdrawn if it is abused or misused.
Please report any comments that break our rules.
Read the rules here